Sir. Devin and Marcus

There are two kinds of people in this world; People who own rams, and people who don’t.

I happen to be one of the people who owned a ram. I personally didn’t own it but our family did. His name was Marcus, the mightiest of all male sheep. Behind bars (the fence) he was a loveable sheep; but when he got out he was a living battering ram.
He was a tough ram.
One day my sister and I were playing outside and Marcus broke his chain. Seeking revenge he immediately charged the first person in sight. This happened to be my little sister. Thankfully she was a smart one and climbed up onto a tire (the kind you see in playgrounds, the ones you can play on).

This is what it looked like. Then there was me, blissfully unaware of the danger that was happening.

Turns out she was lying about the bow; that was just to get my attention. I wandered over to the scene causally. And checked the damage.

Besides my sister screaming everything seemed to be O.K. But I knew I had to do something; be the hero, save the day sort of thing. So I told my sister to stay where she was, and I was to go dawn on some armor and fight the beast.

*Note* Do not attempt this at all! Especially with a dollar store set of plastic armor! They need to start putting a warning on their gear “Does not work in real life”.
I went out to fight the ram. I felt invincible, like Sir George and the Dragon. I was Sir George and Marcus was the dragon. And there he was. Our eyes met. We gave each other cold stares, hoping the other would back down.

And then he laughed at me, and charged. I stood ready to face him.

This went on two more times, of me getting up and then getting run over. While I was distracting the Ram my sister ran.
I am still unsure to this day how I got out of that alive. But I do know I am alive now so I must have made it. I remember a lot of the time crying on the ground while Marcus stood over me, daring me to get up again.  I also remember this was my sisters reaction (she had run to my mom and gotten her so she was there also).

97.03% true story.